


We've Met a Thousand Time Before Idiot

by collapsingStars



Category: Homestuck
Genre: ? - Freeform, Additional Warnings Apply, Alcohol, Also Trolls, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - College/University, Arguments, Bullying, Child violence, Children, DFAB Karkat, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, Humanstuck, M/M, Pre Trans Karkat, depends on the chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-04
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-03-10 10:51:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3287555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/collapsingStars/pseuds/collapsingStars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of Davekat OTP Drabbles, slightly edited, but not much. Cause who doesn't love to read your OTP meet for the first time, a couple hundred different times. That, of course, is the best part. (Also sex but w/e)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Passionately Shove It Down Your Throat (E)

**Author's Note:**

> Writing Exercises from a couple different prompt spots. Ratings are in the title. Feel free to drop by the comment section and spill your thoughts. :)

“THERE ARE TEXAN COMPANIES DUMPING THEIR SHIT IN THE OCEAN. SIGN UP TODAY TO HELP SAVE OUR EARTH'S FIRST AND FOREMOST RESOURCE!”

You sigh at the voice of one loud mouthed Vantas screeching on the street corner again, with his rag tag bunch of environmentalists. You think his name was Kat or something, the youngest of the troll family, but you weren't sure to be honest. All you knew was that the Vantas family was the little town's biggest religious experience or whatever, all big into some stupid cause or another. You'd met the oldest once, the dad. He seemed pretty normal and nice. He even tipped you.

You worked at the little grocery store at the corner a summer job, taking people's things out to their cars.

And today they had picked your corner to picket, which you have to pass all day on the way out to the parking lot. You could feel your headache grow, so you shoved your glasses up higher on your face and kept your head down. Normally your Bro would make fun of you for not facing it and being cool, but you think even he'd do the same in this situation. Your pace picks up as you approach hoping to duck inside before they notice.

“HEY ASSHOLE WITH THE DICKBAG SHADEGIVERS. I'M TALKING TO YOU.”

 _Shit._ You look at the ground and walk faster.

“NO MOTHERFUCKING WAY BUSTER. I WANT YOUR ATTENTION.”

There is a firm hand on your chest, and all this looking at the ground stuff you're doing isn't helping, because you're looking right at him. _Jesus_ is he _tiny, like holy shit._

“Man I am not interested in whatever you're selling.”

“Not selling anything _man,_ but my own voice, to get idiots who have no idea what the Texan oil companies are doing, to listen.”

“Oh is this bout some fracking thing I heard about on the radio?”

“'Some fracking thing,'” he imitates you, making him the single most annoying piece of shit you've ever encountered, “Yes this is about the fracking thing, and these oil companies idiocy. Now take this.”

“What no.” He shoves something alarmingly orange in your face, and you shove it back. He looks at you with disgust and contempt.

“Take the damn flier.”

“Man this is covered in like 101 of business. Don't fucking shove things in people faces.” You take the flier. and put it back in his pile.

“Wow what a prick, just take the flier.” He tries to hand it to you again.

“Wow, fuck, like, no.” You throw the flier. over your shoulder, and one of his team gives you a dirty look; a dark skinned, pink haired female. Unlike the Vantas, her glare scares you. You quickly glance back to Vantas, whose face looks like he's trying to release the stick up his ass.

“Listen here,” he says quietly, and you get distracted from the rest of what he says. His voice sounds like fucking honey when he's not shouting, holy shit, and he's tiny, and so _cute_ , you think. You vaguely recognize him more than 'A Vantas' but you think you might have shared a creative writing class with him at one point. And something to do with Terezi maybe. But he's avidly expressing his thoughts on what's on the flier, his gray cheeks flushed pink with the early morning heat, hair at angles that almost cover up the small rounded horns, like buttons on this head. An “I'd tap that” runs across your brain and demands attention. Something in your soul says you're gonna get to tap that _a lot_ , if you make a fucking move, and oh look he's shouting again. Damn you probably ought to listen if you're interested in him.

“... AND I'VE GOT A QUOTA TO MEET SO THEY'LL LET ME GO HOME AND GET OUT OF THIS FREAKY TEXAN HEAT, SO YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE THIS FLYER AND PROMISE TO COME TO THE MEETING, IF I HAVE TO SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT.”

“Okay.”

“DON'T FUCKING INTERUPT ME... wait what?”

“Okay I'll take the flier and come to your dumb oceans meeting okay? But one one condition.”

“Okay fine. What? Do you want cookies or some shit? Or fucking money? I really don't care, whatever makes you come, so I can harass someone more willing.”

“Go on a date with me?” You smirk and watch as he splutters.

“Wait, what the fuck?”

“You heard me. I want one, just one date from you. Unless you ask for more.” You waggle your eyebrows at him and he scoffs.

You wait in patience, as he scrunches up his adorable face in though and thinks it over. He sighs and starts to move, and for a second you think it'll be a no.

“Okay fine. Whatever. I haven't had a date in forever anyway. You got a pen?”

“Wow, wait? Okay. Okay, hell yes! Yeah.” You trip over yourself to hand him the pen from your pocket and he scribbles something on the abused orange flier.

“Here's my number. Shoot me a text when you've better thought what we're going to do on this date.”

“Wow, okay. Um I'll text you then...?”

“Karkat.”

“Dave.”

“Nice to meet you Karkat.”

“Yeah, yeah. And while Feferi's glaring at me; help save the oceans from company monstrosities, asshat.”

 


	2. Left Handed Desks (T)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Headcanon and Over-Used Trope City. Also like five pages long. Woops.

 “Oh my god, are we really going to do this right now?” The blond gave a look to the girl in black trying to get his attention.

“Yes. I sit there, so you have to move!” Said the girl.

“How about, you do so not, just because you sat here yesterday doesn't mean that you get to sit here. It's new day!”

“The teacher assigned my seat there, fartnugget! I have to sit there! Besides it's uncomfortable to sit in another desk!”

“I don't care!”

“You stupid-head! I'm left handed, I need to sit there!” She was screaming at him now.

“You're so special! Well I'm left handed too so HA. I need to sit here!”

“Move!”

The short girl pushed the dumb blond kid with his pointy sunglasses onto the floor from the desk. She screeched in victory and tried to scramble her way over the bar and into the desk, but the kid with shades is having none of it. He pushes her over onto the floor, and sits on top of the desk with his feet in the chair.

“Ha I win!” He looks at the little girl, who is rubbing her head and crying.

“Ow that hurt you dumb dumb.”

“Ha you're crying!” He says and points. “Only dumb girls cry.”

“I'm not dumb.” She shouts at him and stands. The boy with pointy shades watches her stand, and laughs some more.

“Well what are you going to do little girl? You can't fight me. I may not have my sword, but my bro taught me how to fight with my fists too.” He sneered at her.

The little girl stood there and trembled. It was bad enough that there were plenty of bullies who made fun her, but now there was a new one.

“I'm not a little girl.” she whispered.

“What did you say?”

“I'm NOT A LITTLE GIRL!” The little girl clad in black launched herself at the boy with pointy sunglasses and toppled him over the desk and onto the carpet. She took aim at his sunglasses and tried to take them off, but he pushed her and tried to sit on her middle. His hand got too close to her face and she bit down on his finger. During his shout of surprise she punched his stomach and landed again on his butt. She tried to take her hands to his face, but he stopped her, holding onto her wrists. She tried to kick him but he flipped her over, sitting on her, and letting go of her hands to pull her hair. This seemed to make her really mad, and she threw him off. He stumbled backward into the book shelf, the little girl climbing stumbling after him. He steps to the side as she runs into it, falling over onto her back. The bookshelf wobbled dangerously.

The boy with shades watched as it started to fall over onto the little girl, who wasn't paying attention, rubbing her forehead where she had hit it on a book that stuck out too far. He panicked, not wanting her to get mushed and pulled on her arm. She wouldn't budge, and turned to look at him with a sneer. She saw the panic on his face and felt a book fall next to her. She looked up and ran toward the boy just as the bookcase picked up speed and fell on the floor, causing a calamity of noise.

The two looked at each other in a panic.

“We are going to be in so much trouble.” The pointy sunglasses kid said.

“WE? You knocked it over!” The girl replied.

“No I didn't. You ran into it!”

“Cause you wouldn't stand still!”

“Course not, you were trying to hit me!”

“Cause you stole my desk!”

“No it's not your desk! And you pushed me first!”

“No you started it when you stole my desk, duh!”

“No you started it when you pushed me!”

“You started it!”

“No you started it!” The little girl coiled back and hit the kid square in the nose. He screamed and slapped her. They started to go at each other again when a loud voice shouted over them.

“What is going on here!?”

The teacher stood in the doorway, looking alarmed at the two seven-year-old’s'. They sprung apart and looked at the ground. As she came closer to the scene of the crime, they shuffled and waited for her to say something.

“What are you two doing in here?” She asked. Her blue dress fluttered around her knees as she crouched to look at the two of them, trying to hide their faces. “Karkat, it's too early for you to be in the classroom. Want to explain to me what happened?”

“My dad dropped me off early cause he had another important flight to catch. And I didn't want to eat breakfast, cause I already had breakfast, and I didn't want to play outside, cause _they_ are out there, so I thought I could come practice my cursive b's cause I didn't finish yesterday. And then I found HIM sitting in my desk and he wouldn't move, and he was being mean to me, and he pushed me!”

“NUH UH. You pushed me first!” The boy chimed in and tried to defend himself.

“No!” Karkat cried.

“Hush, both of you.” The teacher said coldly, silencing the children. She sighed and pinched her fingers on the bridge of her nose. “What's your name young man?”

“I'm David Strider!”

“Oh yes. I heard you would be arriving today. Where is your guardian? He is supposed to be with you.”

“Bro said to tell you he had signed all the paperwork already and that I could handle myself.”

“Well that's apparent,” She mumbled, “Hi Dave, I'm your teacher, Ms. Serket. So you two fought yes? Mind telling me what happened to the bookshelf then, Dave?”

“Karkat pushed me into it and then she ran into it.” The teacher looked to Karkat who gave her a stiff nod, trying not to cry.

“Okay. Now, why were you fighting over the desk Dave? Surely you know that there are assigned seats and that is Karkat's assigned seat.”

“Cause it's the only left handed seat in the room! And I'm left handed!”

“Okay, well, instead of fighting with Karkat, you should have waited until school started so I could get you a proper desk and put you on the seating chart. It's very rude to steal someone's seat, much less listen to them when they tell you not to. Okay?”

“Okay.” Dave grumbled.

“Ha ha!” Karkat chimed, pointing, “I win!”

“Karkat.” The teacher scolded her. “You're not to blame either. Do you remember the discussion we had last year about fighting?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“What did we discuss?”

“Something about finding an adult when someone bullies you.”

“That's right. Remember to come find me next time, okay? Now you're both in trouble.” The seven-year-olds groaned. “I'm going to have to phone your 'Bro' okay Dave?”

“I'm going to have to wash so many swords, again.” he lamented. Ms. Serket gave him a wary look.

“And Karkat, you said your father was flying? Yes?”

“Yes ma'am.”

“I'm going to have to call Kankri okay?”

“Please don't! I won't have ears anymore!”

“Well I can't not. Let's take you two to the nurses office and get you patched up. I won't make you stay after school, but during recesses, you're going to work together and put the books back in the bookshelf, in alphabetical order, and then help me rearrange the desks so we can put Dave's desk in.”

Both seven year olds groaned as Ms. Serket stood and held out her hands. Dave took her right one, as Karkat took her left and guided them outside to cross the playground towards the nurses office.

Karkat shied away and tried to hide Ms. Serket's skirt. She took them across the yard where a bunch of boys were playing with a kickball. Dave watched them, wishing that he had gone out to play instead of getting in a fight with a stupid girl. They looked older and cool.

“It's okay Karkat.” Ms. Serket said. She pulled Karkat our from her dress and almost immediately the boys in the field took notice.

“Hey! It's Karkat! What are you today Karkat?”

Dave watched curiously as they crooned and jeered at her.

“What kind of girl wears black?”

“Hey where did your hair go Karkat? Who said you could look like boy?”

“Why did you stop wearing your pretty dresses Karkat? You look so dumb!”

“My Mom said that you and your family are stupid and wrong!”

“Just ignore them Karkat.” Ms. Serket said, walking a little faster. She had tried since last year to get the bullies to stop, but they persisted, no amount of parenting or counseling had helped. The yard felt like it was miles across. Dave watched Karkat hold her head up high.

But the insults changed. Spanish flew more rapidly than the English had, Ms. Serket not understanding a lick of it, and Karkat getting every word. Her composure fell, head hung, and tears started to fall.

She didn't know that Dave understood every word they were shouting as well.

Suddenly Dave thought that they didn't seem so cool. His Bro had taught him that the words they were using were insulting and hurtful. He didn't know quite why, but it had something to do with how his Bro was, and maybe Karkat was the same.

Dave pulled his hand out from the teachers and ran around, as she shouted after him. He didn't go run towards the boys however, but toward Karkat. He took her hand in his and put himself between her and the bullies. They crooned at him now too, but he could handle it. He felt awful enough, and after hearing about the fight and Karkat, Bro would have his butt. Karkat tried to shake him away in a panic, but he persisted.

“You shouldn't have to deal with them after me.” He said. Karkat held onto his hand and didn't say anything. She hid behind him, and Ms. Serket didn't object.

After forever they finally came inside to the nurses office.

The nurse fluttered and blurred around them, helping make sure his nose was okay, cleaning up the blood and putting cream on the bruises. She put band-aids on and gave them each ice. Karkat held hers to her forehead and Dave held his to his nose. The nurse left to go get the school counselor, she said, for Karkat, and made the two promise not to fight again. After the two had agreed she left the them to sit in silence.

Except Karkat was mumbling something under her breath.

“What did you say?” Dave asked.

“None of your business.” She replied, glaring at him.

“Okay.” Dave backed off.

After a while he heard was she was saying with barely any air.

 _I'm not worthless just because I'm different. I'm not worthless just because I'm different._ Over and over.

“I'm sorry!” Dave blurted, feeling awful and dumb.

“What?” Karkat looked up at him.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.”

“You fought back, I think you did.”

“I didn't... I guess I did. I'm still sorry. I'm sorry you have bullies, and that I made your day worse, and I know that it's not fair. I was being dumb.”

“I accept your apology.” she said stiffly.

“It's okay if you cry. They're being mean and it feels better after you cry. I do too sometimes. It's doesn't make you a dumb girl.”

“I'm NOT a girl.”

“Then are you a boy?”

Karkat looked at Dave and then down at the ground. After a puff of breath Karkat hid themselves between their knees and said quietly, “I don't know.”

“Oh, okay. That's okay. You'll figure it out.”

“Maybe. No one seems to know what to do with me. I don't even know what I am. But I feel

wrong, and others make fun of me for trying to figure it out. None of the adults seem to be able to help, and Kankri tells me stuff I don't understand.”

“Well, whatever you decide and find out, I think you're cool.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, you fight really well, I like someone who tries to stand up for themselves. Even though it's hard.”

“Yeah, like you would know.”

“I do! People used to call me a demon before I moved.”

“Why would they call you that?”

“Cause of my eyes.” Dave took off his sunglasses and looked at Karkat. Karkat just kind of stared for a little bit, making Dave nervous, before:

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah. They're cool I guess, and I haven't seen someone with red eyes before, but they're just a color. It's dumb to make fun of someone cause of the color of their eyes.”

“And you're just you. It's dumb to make fun of someone cause they don't know who they are yet.”

“Hey Dave?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”

Karkat reached across and hugged Dave. Dave sat shocked until he found his arms also rested around Karkat's shoulders. They rested against each other, exhausted already as the bell for class rang.

The counselor, nurse and Ms. Serket found them like that, asleep on each others shoulders, and breathed a sigh of relief. 


	3. My Valentine Is Sleeping Over (T-M)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don't you hate it when you're a single pringle for valentine's day?

Karkat started to push things into his knapsack before Gamzee could even rise to answer Tavros's knock. He ignored the matesprits wet smooches in the doorway, and the whispered confessions. He ignored the mutual ass grabbing and crammed his headphones into his ears.

He really freaking hated February. It made the both of them impossible. Impossible to the point where they tried to get it on, even though he was not even five feet away in the other bed trying to sleep. And then had the audacity to complain at him when he asked them to stop. 

He knew when he was not wanted around, and it was more often than not as of late.

He shoved a sweater into his bag and a small pillow along with the laptop and it's charger, glad he had finished his homework earlier (for once.) He eyed the romance novel on his bed, wondering whether or not he should take that too. Then he heard Gamzee proclaim that it was their third year anniversary and that they loved each other so much over his phone playing "Take Me To Church" at max, and he decided he didn't want to find another reason to hate himself tonight. Netflix would be enough.

The small troll threw the bag over his shoulder and took off out the door.

“Hey motherfuckin best friend! Where you going?” Gamzee asked over Tavros's kisses. 

“Out. I'll see you tomorrow for lunch.” Karkat replied.

“Oh. Okay.” Gamzee just smiled at him. Karkat rolled his eyes and closed the door to the tiny 15' by 10' dorm room and started down the hall. 

Karkat found himself outside, trekking across campus against the freezing wind. All his friends were likely out tonight, except Aradia, who also happened to have a spare bed in her suite. He shot her a text, asking if he could steal the spare bed in her room... again. She was probably expecting him at this point.

He arrived outside the courtyard door to her building, and waited for her to come get him because his keycard didn't work in this door. He tried to huddle in his hoodie away from the wind, but it wasn't working. He regretted deciding to room with Gamzee, and for not bringing a coat with him, and _Why was Aradia taking so long?_ Just as he was about to call her, his phone buzzed, letting him know he had a text.

'AA: sorry karkat! sollux is over tonight and i don't think you'd sleep very well ;) good luck!'

Karkat leaned against the door and sobbed.

GOD he hated Valentine's Day!

“Lost your card or something?” He heard someone say.

Dave Strider stood behind him, all bundled up in his warm coat, and looked Karkat up and down in only his jeans and a hoodie.

“Oh. Hi Dave.” Karkat greeted his, for all intents and purposes, boss. Karkat did work-study for computing services as a lab tech, and Dave, though a junior undergrad student, was in charge of making sure all the employees kept their hours. He was a cool-as-fuck douchebag, but an alright person once you got past the fake persona, Karkat supposed.

“So like I said, forgot your card?” Dave said. 

“Oh. No. I actually live in Girry hall, but I was hoping a friend would let me stay in their room tonight.”

“Why?” Dave moved passed Karkat to open the door and let them both inside to the Corando's lobby, out of the winter wind.

“Cause my fucking roommate has his matesprit over. Again. And I live in the tiny-ass freshman rooms.”

“Ahh. I see. That sucks.” Dave said deadpan.

“Thanks for the sympathy. And for letting me in. Motherfucker's balls it is cold.”

“Anytime. What are you going to do now though?”

Karkat gave it thought. Everyone else he was comfortable with was probably with their own romantic partner right now. It was valentine's day weekend after all. The only one without anyone right now was probably Eridan.

Yeah. No.

“I guess I'll just walk across campus to apartment housing and ask the RA if he can let me into the campus community house so I can crash on the couch. If not then I'll just camp out in the Girry lounge.” Karkat moved to make his way out the door, back into the oncoming snowstorm.

“Dude, that's a long shot and there are nothing but tables in that lounge.”

“Didn't say I was going to be sleeping.”

“I know you have that weekend class first thing tomorrow morning.”

“I'll be fine. It's not the first time.”

“Dude.” Dave looked at Karkat. The troll had bags under his eyes and he slouched inward from the weight on his back, clearly exhausted. Karkat rolled his eyes and began to walk away, but Dave couldn't let him sleep on the cold tile floor in his lounge. 

“Just come sleep on my floor.” He said.

“What?”

“You might even get a bed too. Depends on what my best friend decides to do tonight with my cousin.” 

“Wait what, no. I barely know you. Also what about your best friend has anything to do with that?"

“I insist." He grabbed Karkat by the wrist and pulled the confused, shorter male away from the door and toward the stairs. "I'll tell you about my bff on the way. I'm up in the suite on the third floor.”

Karkat pulled back and stopped Dave from dragging him up the stairs to contemplate his options. He hesitated, weirded out by Dave's sudden erratic behavior but replied, “If you're sure.”

“Come one. I'm not that much of a dickbag, and if it helps, I happen to be a lonely sack of shit too, so I'm not going to kick you out for some romantic partner.”

“Alright." Karkat decided and followed him up the stairs, "Now what was that about your roommate again?”

“My best friend, John, is going out with my cousin Roxy. They are probably going to her apartment to fuck after their date, so chances are, you can sleep in my bed and I can sleep in his. If that's not awkward.” 

“Naw, that's not awkward. Sounds like the best option right now anyway.”

“It's settled then. Soon as I get a text that brags to me he's getting laid, I'll let you know.”

Karkat followed Dave down the hall and raced him up the stairs, to his door at the top. Dave let Karkat in and invited him to drop his stuff on his bed. There were posters lining the walls, with invisible tape, all of famous rappers and rock bands. There were photos crammed into the places in between them, of Dave, of what looked like his best friend, a raven-haired male that starred in most of them. Karkat had seen John around campus. Dave spoke, interrupting his self guided tour. 

“So it's still pretty early, have you eaten dinner?”

“Yeah. I'm on the meal plan.”

“Cool. Then want to get drunk with me?”

“Wait, what?” Dave held out a can of beer towards Karkat. “That's really illegal.”

“Yeah, and we're both single pringles on Valentine's Day. Plus I don't even have that much beer to get us much passed buzzed. What do you say?”

Karkat eyed the can warily, but reached out to take it. “Sure, why not?”

“You've had alcohol before haven't you?”

“To be honest? Not really.”

“No shit? I bet you're a super light weight.”

“Bitch please. You said it wasn't even enough to get us buzzed.”

“Let's see then.”

…

“So that's how I ended up being a knight.” Dave loudly proclaimed.

“I think you're fucking lying.” Karkat snorted from where he was tucked into Dave's shoulder.

“I am SO not. There's a certificate of authenticity and everything. I'm legit.”

“Bullshit. Where is it?”

“Wouldn't you know it. It burned down in the fire that claimed my life's savings for my world cruise.”

“You're so full of shit Strider.” Karkat giggled.

It was late, both boys tipsy, having found a more cans of beer in Dave's car, and were currently lying on the floor staring at Dave's glow in the dark stars. Both wore pajamas, Karkat borrowing a set of Dave's to make it a legit sleep over. There was an orange glow coming from the window, the violent snow storm in full swing. The weather reports had confirmed that it wasn't going to leave for a couple days, trapping everyone where they were. John had confirmed for the both of them that he was not coming home until it was over. Karkat wasn't going to be able to cross campus to his dorm for a while either. He didn't mind.

“Yeah, but you're a little shit.” Dave said.

“I am not.” Karkat replied.

“Are too.”

"Am not."

"Are too."

“Also not going to argue like a five-year old.”

“You look five.”

“Fuck you.”

“Mmmm. Not a bad offer. I'd take it.”

Karkat watched Dave sit up to take of his sweater, showing off the man's toned body. Karkat eyed him while he wasn't looking. Man either he was desperate or Dave was really, really hot. Probably both. Also he was probably a lightweight and hella drunk.

“You into trolls then?” Karkat asked as he laid back down. Dave looked at him and deliberately trailed his eyes over Karkat's form, causing both to blush.

“Sure.”

 _Score._ Both thought.

Karkat rolled himself over on top of Dave and planted his face in front of his. Dave felt solid beneath him, his breath heavy with the stench of cheap alcohol. Dave's hands rested on Karkat's sides, tickling his grub scars. Karkat leaned down, threatening to kiss him, Dave going silent. Karkat hesitated, glancing up at the other male to catch his mischievous expression before- 

“Noot, noot.” Dave whispered, Karkat barley half an inch from his mouth.

“Mother of FUCK.” Karkat flung himself off Dave, and threw himself into Dave's bed. He screamed into the pillow, while Dave giggled himself into a coma on the floor.

“That's it I'm stealing your bed, you mood ruining turdblast.”

“Oh come on it was funny.”

“No it wasn't you stupid fuck. I thought I was going to get laid.” Despite his claims though, Karkat was laughing as well. The sheer ridiculousness of the situation and the alcohol was kicking his funny bone. Him get laid, by someone so ridiculously attractive? That WAS funny. As Karkat laughed at his own misery, Dave stood clumsily and helped Karkat off the bed. He crushed Karkat to him, chest to chest, as they both giggled until they ran out of air.

“Sorry man. I'd love to. But fucking drunk is not a good idea. Like. Ever.”

“I know.” Karkat wiped the tears out of his eyes and tried to regain his breath. A sob rose out of him unbidden and Dave looked down at his face. Hands rose to help wipe away Karkat's tears, and shushed at him to prevent more. Something in the air changed, both trying to calm the overcharged and run away emotions. Karkat gulped and Dave hummed underneathe his breath. Karkat sighed and rested his face in the other's neck. "I'm being dumb. I'm sorry. I know you like that tall islander girl that always comes in for computer help."

"Actually not true, also you don't have to apologize."

"Bullshit and you flirt with her all the time," Karkat refuted, "and you've been hanging out with her for like, three weeks now. I'm actually surprised that you're not out with her tonight."

"Dude, that's John's cousin and she and I have been friends since like five-ever. It'd be so weird to date her. And I've been hanging out with her so much because she's been helping me become better dating material."

"For who?" Karkat asked, desperate and drunk, and unwilling to let go of Dave, because dumb beer, and really fucking sad. 

"Um... you actually." Dave admitted quietly. 

Karkat pulled away and looked up at Dave. He was turning as red as a tomato, and Karkat was sure you could see the pink underneath his own cheeks. There was no way. "Bullshit." He called.

"No really! I've been trying to ask you out since the semester freaking started, but I... I don't know. I was so nervous I guess. Plus your moirail scares me, I was afraid if I goofed he'd fry me, and I always fuck a relationship up somehow."

"So you went to Jade to help you? Also Gamzee is like the chillest motherfucker on the planet, everyone knows that."

"Yeah, but I really hate clowns. Like legit fear clownphobia." 

"Pfft. Clownphobia." Karkat chuckled.

"Shut up. I really like you." Dave said seriously. He looked at Karkat, trying to convey how much he meant what he'd said. Karkat's brain halted all production of thought and couldn't answer. Disbelief froze him colder than the snow being hurled around outside. There was no way that this gorgeous man would want to date  _him._ _  
_

Dave looked at Karkat and fluttered his eyelashes at him, leaning in. Karkat's breath stopped and he wound his arms around Dave's neck. Dave's hands slipped to wrap around his lower back, and Karkat hiccuped as his heart beat sped up. He felt dizzy and nervous, and even though he really was a lightweight, Karkat was sure this wasn't from the alcohol. He slipped his face closer to Dave's, noses brushing in eskimo kisses and hesitation on both sides. Both felt themselves sober up quick in light of what they wanted, but knew wouldn't be a wise idea, not while technically inebriated. They stood like that, supporting each other in the silence of the room, glow in the dark stars above and the wind screaming outside. Dave spoke, breaking the prefect silence.

“So, when we're both sober," he spoke quietly, "want to be my Valentine?”

“Why?” Karkat looked up at Dave, who had gone totally red.

“Because you're cute, and a little spitfire, and I think you're cool.”

“Okay. Sure. Also I feel sober now.” A hiccup punctuated the end of his speech, and Dave gave a full out guffaw, causing Karkat to turn red.

"Bullshit, also you're such a freshman."

"Whatever. We should sleep this shit off."

“Awesome idea.” Dave leaned down and glanced his mouth across Karkat's, surprising him. Karkat's ears turned red at the soft lips pressing against his. He pushed back and Dave broke it off, pulling away, far too quickly.

“So I'm not going to lie, I really kind of don't want to let you go and I really don't want to sleep in John's bed. It smells like Roxy's perfume and lacrosse sweat."

"Gross." 

"And you smell much better, minus the alcohol breath and you're cuddlier than a body pillow. And I like seeing you in my clothes. I could go on, you should sleep in my bed with me. Just sleep. Please."

"Wow do you have it bad."

"You fucking drive me crazy."

"Mmm. Good." Karkat broke away and enjoyed seeing Dave stumble after him a bit. He climbed into Dave's bed, lying on his side facing him, and Dave just kind of stared in shock. Geez he looked as wrecked as Karkat felt. "Well come on then." Karkat said, breaking Dave's stare.

Dave eyes shone as he slipped into bed, snuggling Karkat to his front just as he had done when they were standing. They watched each other in the dark, both in disbelief at their perfect moment, before nodding off as the snowstorm wore on outside. 


End file.
